Lessons learned in the suffering

For you, God, tested us you refined us like silver. You brought us into prison and laid burdens on our backs. You let people ride over our heads; went through fire and water; but you brought us to a place of abundance. ~Psalm 66:10-12

This past week was a tough one.  I started off Sunday with my mind and heart prepared for the battles that were before me.  I was confident and raring to go slay those giants.  God have given me a word and I was sure of the victory,  But then the horrors of “war” were upon me. I  was getting attacked on all sides.  Physical pain racked my body and fatigue impaired my cognitive ability.  I kept trying to press my way through , but the emotional toll from circumstance on my job began to weaken my spirit.  Where was my faith?!  Where are those words of encouragement that I shared with others showing in my own storm? I had called the enemy and he was itching to prove me false.  He thought he had a pinned me down, but God said no!

Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me!~Psalm 66:20

God not only heard my prayer, but the prayers of the saints who interceded on my behalf.  I also know that God hears my big brother and my Lord, Jesus,  speaking for me.  So even as I was placed in a prison with all sorts of burdens on my back and trying to swim through the waters, my God brought me to a place of abundance.  

He brought me to a place of abundant mercy, comfort, grace, and hope,  He sent reinforcements to hold me up when I thought I couldn’t stand any longer.  He made me slippery with the anointing of His Spirit so that the enemy could not hold me down.  He brought me into a place of deeper understanding about how was letting the gifts He has given me become idols in my life.  He brought me to a place of understanding, through my pain, that I don’t have to let fear about what people think about my disease from their lack of understanding influence my actions.  He brought me back to Himself where true peace resides.

So where was my faith? What lesson did I learn?  My faith was always present, but my dependency must remain on Him alone.  Not by abilities or sheer determination, but solely on His power.  It is okay for me to be weak.  It shows His power.  It is okay to cry out because they crying out places my hope on Him alone.  I am still in this frail body, but one day I will have an eternal body and live with my Lord.

For now, I am still in the fire.  He is refining me. I still am going through the storms. He is strengthening my faith.   I still have burdens that He wants me to bear, but I am not alone.  He is with me in the fire just like He was with the three Hebrews boys ( Daniel 3). He is with me in the storms  just like He was with disciples( Mark 4:35-41).  He has caused me to walk out of my prison, just like He did with Peter (Acts 12:6-11).  God is my help with every trouble. 

Father, the tests are hard and sometimes painful, but help me to look for the lessons You are teaching me.  Help me to endure and trust You.  I thank You for your love and grace in the time of my sorrows and my joy.  Thank You for the victories,  You are good and You are God.  In Jesus name. Amen